Fighting A Battle

Sunday, September 19, 2021


Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle, just like you. Every smile or sign of strength hides an inner struggle every bit as complex and extraordinary as your own.

And remember that embracing your light doesn’t mean ignoring your dark. We are measured by our ability to overcome adversities and insecurities, not avoid them. Supporting, sharing and making contributions to other people is one of life’s greatest rewards. This happens naturally if we allow it, because we all share very similar dreams, needs and struggles.

Once we accept this, the world then is a place where we can look someone else in the eye and say, “I’m lost and struggling at the moment,” and they can nod and say, "Me too."

People rarely behave exactly the way you want them to. Hope for the best, but expect less.

And remember, the magnitude of your happiness will be directly proportional to your thoughts and how you choose to think about things.

Even if a situation or relationship doesn’t work out at all, it’s still worth it if it made you feel something new, and if it taught you something new...

Riding A Bike

Saturday, September 18, 2021


This is from Kelly Rae Roberts. You can subscribe and receive these in your inbox.

Trust your inner knowing.

Your voice, those whispers that call to you, are a divine reflection of your purpose here. Your knowingness is whole, complete, and always always your most accurate heart compass. Allow it to guide you. You can trust its wisdom, which comes from an ancient essence of love and more love of which you are a part of.

Step deeper into your power.

  • Trust that you are here to step into the vastness that is you.
  • Own your significance, never dim or downplay your worthiness
  • Allow your story and the paths you’ve traveled to inform and confirm your authority of what you know to be true
  • Share that truth. Allow it to heal, shine, nuture, inspire, and create soul deep connections
  • Claim your courage as honesty and living brave
  • Celebrate your quirks and uniqueness as the superpower that they are.

Know that what you’re doing in this world matters.

Your work. Your parenting. Your responding. Your knowings. Your hugs. Your smile to the stranger on the sidewalk. The gracious email you sent. Your paintings. Your poetry. Your story. Your teaching. You’re nurturing. Your falling apart. Your conscious rebuilding. What you’re doing in this world matter. Thank you for showing up.

I believe in us, friends, and know how you're stepping deeper into all of this. I'd love to know. xxo


Now, and update from me. I have been riding my bike for a week now. Yes, he has improved physically. His mind is much slower. I can say that he is less confused...with a grain of salt.... We drove to the small town grocery here, I gave him the cart for support and we walked to the one way automatic doors. Then, when at the doors...he didn't know how to enter the store.

I have noticed that he walks thru the house and turns on all the lights and TV's.  The thing is that he doesn't remember to turn them off. Cognition is not there. He watched TV, and had the radio on a football game. Loud, See what I mean?

The one thing that is better for me, is that he listens to me, and doesn't argue constantly.

I would rather be riding a horse.

Thursday, September 16, 2021

Honestly, I have been caregiving for 5 days...and I am tired. I really would rather be riding a horse like this woman.

Knots in my stomach, and barely eating right now. I have listened to him talking to friends on the phone. He tells them very far fetched, wild, fictional tales....and he believes himself to be telling a true story. The good news is that he is improving and getting better physically everyday.

I believe that if the hospital had made him stay (and they did want to) he would be much worse and probably need a nursing home. And maybe get Covid there. The care at the hospital was really bad, understaffed, and very poor care. The fact that no one is allowed to see any inpatient, maybe due to the quality of care.

They said that he needed physical therapy to walk. OK, the problem was someone saw him for a few minutes every 2 days....that wasn't even an effort to get him going and home.

All in is good that I snuck in to see him. I was appalled by his very deplorable condition. I spoke up and I did get him discharged that day. Maybe, they didn't want trouble from me.  I am certain the patients were not getting quality care.

What am I going to do? My goal is to get him back in healthy condition, get the damn prostate taken care of, and able to do his normal activities.

I still want to be the woman on the horse! 


Sneaking Old Woman

Wednesday, September 15, 2021


This post was written a few days ago, Sunday Sept 12,2021

I am extremely tired right now. He kept calling me during the middle of the night, and randomly thru the night, I was sleeping well before that. He kept asking how to get out of the hospital. He felt like a prisoner and was being held hostage by the hospital. 

The COVID factor is that the hospital will not allow any visitors. None. Therefore, I could not see his condition with my own eyes.

Well, I made a plan. (this will shock you) I would get to his room to see him. Every large building has several back stairs for getting out quickly. I had to find one and quietly get to his room. 

I did it! Wow, were the staff extremely surprised! LOL! Did they think everyone is stupid! Even old ladies. The rebel in me burst out. I started dialog to meet the standards for a discharge.

Eventually he was discharged.

Alan Jackson - Where Were You

Sunday, September 12, 2021